Californianing: Another Heaping Spoonful of "Governmental" Insanity -- SB777 versus Monty Python

It's Me — Wry Mouth! You Got a Problem With That?!
Coming to an already broken state near you in January 2008! Thanks, Senate! Thanks, Gubbernor!
There's Too Much Good Stuff in this; my head is swimming, so
Let's just get you warmed up right away:
This act shall be known, and may be cited, as the California Student Civil Rights Act.Yup. I know. You, dear reader, appreciate bureaucratic irony as much as I, and you can see it coming, can't you? What "Student Civil Rights" do the dear CA legislature deem most important? Can you guess?
And lo, behold the linguistic and bureaucratic beauty that is Section 422 of the California Penal Code (excerpts; I cannot tax my own sanity by reproducing the whole thing):SEC. 1.5. Section 200 of the Education Code is amended to read:
200. It is the policy of the State of California to afford all
persons in public schools, regardless of their disability, gender,
nationality, race or ethnicity, religion, sexual orientation, or any
other characteristic that is contained in the definition of hate
crimes set forth in Section 422.55 of the Penal Code, equal rights
and opportunities in the educational institutions of the state.
Any person who willfully threatens to commit a crime which will result in death or great bodily injury to another person, with the specific intent that the statement, made verbally, in writing, or by means of an electronic communication device, is to be taken as a threat, even if there is no intent of actually carrying it out, which, on its face and under the circumstances in which it is made, is so unequivocal, unconditional, immediate, and specific as to convey to the person threatened, a gravity of purpose and an immediate prospect of execution of the threat, and thereby causes that person reasonably to be in sustained fear for his or her own safety or for his or her immediate family's safety, shall be punished by imprisonment in the county jail not to exceed one year, or by imprisonment in the state prison.
For the purposes of this section, "immediate family" means any spouse, whether by marriage or not, parent, child, any person related by consanguinity or affinity within the second degree, or any other person who regularly resides in the household, or who, within the prior six months, regularly resided in the household.
—-
For purposes of this title, and for purposes of all other state law unless an explicit provision of law or the context clearly requires a different meaning, the following shall apply:
(a) "Hate crime" means a criminal act committed, in whole or in part, because of one or more of the following actual or perceived characteristics of the victim:
(1) Disability.
(2) Gender.
(3) Nationality.
(4) Race or ethnicity.
(5) Religion.
(6) Sexual orientation.
(7) Association with a person or group with one or more of these actual or perceived characteristics.
(b) "Hate crime" includes, but is not limited to, a violation of
Section 422.6.
For purposes of this title, the following definitions shall apply:
(a) "Association with a person or group with these actual or perceived characteristics" includes advocacy for, identification with, or being on the ground owned or rented by, or adjacent to, any of the following: a community center, educational facility, family, individual, office, meeting hall, place of worship, private institution, public agency, library, or other entity, group, or person that has, or is identified with people who have, one or more of those characteristics listed in the definition of "hate crime" under paragraphs 1 to 6, inclusive, of subdivision (a) of Section 422.55.
(b) "Disability" includes mental disability and physical disability as defined in Section 12926 of the Government Code.
(c) "Gender" means sex, and includes a person's gender identity and gender related appearance and behavior whether or not stereotypically associated with the person's assigned sex at birth.
(d) "In whole or in part because of" means that the bias motivation must be a cause in fact of the offense, whether or not other causes also exist. When multiple concurrent motives exist, the prohibited bias must be a substantial factor in bringing about the particular result. There is no requirement that the bias be a main factor, or that the crime would not have been committed but for the actual or perceived characteristic. This subdivision does not constitute a change in, but is declaratory of, existing law under In re M.S.(1995) 10 Cal. 4th 698 and People v. Superior Court (Aishman) (1995) 10 Cal. 4th 735.
(e) "Nationality" includes citizenship, country of origin, and national origin.
(f) "Race or ethnicity" includes ancestry, color, and ethnic background.
(g) "Religion" includes all aspects of religious belief, observance, and practice and includes agnosticism and atheism.
(h) "Sexual orientation" means heterosexuality, homosexuality, or bisexuality.
(i) "Victim" includes, but is not limited to, a community center, educational facility, entity, family, group, individual, office, meeting hall, person, place of worship, private institution, public agency, library, or other victim or intended victim of the offense.
(a) No person, whether or not acting under color of law, shall by force or threat of force, willfully injure, intimidate, interfere with, oppress, or threaten any other person in the free exercise or enjoyment of any right or privilege secured to him or her by the Constitution or laws of this state or by the Constitution or laws of the United States in whole or in part because of one or more of the actual or perceived characteristics of the victim listed in subdivision (a) of Section 422.55.
Will this hairball of law apply even to private schools? Hmm...
—-SEC. 2. Section 210.1 of the
Education Code is amended and renumbered to read:
210.3. "Educational institution" means a public or private
preschool, elementary, or secondary school or institution;
the governing board of a school district; or any combination
of school districts or counties recognized as the administrative
agency for public elementary or secondary schools.
So there's that. But here's the meat of the document — you're asking, "how can a large government possibly screw up nondiscrimination legislation?" You add, "I know it's technically unnecessary if one applies laws for other reasons — e.g., "hate crimes" are a totally unnecessary category of crime — but even the Politburo in Sacramento couldn't turn this into some sort of legal free-for-all? Could they?"*Section 220.5 of the Education Code is amended and
renumbered to read:
221. This article shall not apply to an educational institution
that is controlled by a religious organization if the application
would not be consistent with the religious tenets of that
organization.
Oh, my. You've never lived in California; have you?
Erm... "gender identity" unrelated to the "assigned" sex at birth?Section 210.7 is added to the Education Code, to read:
210.7. "Gender" means sex**, and includes a person's gender
identity and gender related appearance and behavior whether or not
stereotypically associated with the person's assigned sex at birth.
What, after all, does DNA really have to do with anything? These guys (I am setting assigned sexes aside to simplify my grammar, if that is alright with everyone) make Young Earth Creationists look like Newton, Einstein and Maxwell rolled up into one.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE CAN YOU PASS A LAW SO I CAN BE A BLACK JAZZ SAXOPHONE PLAYER? IF SEX IS A FLEXIBLE SOCIETAL CONSTRUCT, HOW LONG MUST I WAIT UNTIL YOU GET AROUND TO RACE AND RELIGION? AND PHYSICAL HEALTH?
Can I be a Muslim Eastern Orthodox Catholic, too? Aw heck — make me the next Sammy Davis, Jr! He's one of my heroes!
About that whole atheism and agnosticism as religion bit: how are they going to enforce the fabled "separation of church and state" now? California laws are strewn liberally with good intentions gone terribly awry.SEC. 6. Section 212 is added to the Education Code, to read:
212. "Nationality" includes citizenship, country of origin, and
national origin.
SEC. 7. Section 212.1 is added to the Education Code, to read:
212.1. "Race or ethnicity" includes ancestry, color, and ethnic
background.
SEC. 8. Section 212.3 is added to the Education Code, to read:
212.3. "Religion" includes all aspects of religious belief,
observance, and practice and includes agnosticism and atheism.
SEC. 9. Section 212.6 is added to the Education Code, to read:
212.6. "Sexual orientation" means heterosexuality, homosexuality,
or bisexuality.
But that does give me an idear... relative to
221. This article shall not apply to an educational institution
that is controlled by a religious organization
Also, how long do you think it will take an atheist to sue the state for defamation?
Also, I smell a lawsuit from the foot-fetishists, et. al. It is sadly disappointing that they stopped the definition of "sexual orientation" after only three categories.
And didn't the Monty Python troupe cover this ground already?:
- JUDITH:
- I do feel, Reg, that any Anti-Imperialist group like ours must reflect such a divergence of interests within its power-base.
- REG:
- Agreed. Francis?
- FRANCIS:
- Yeah. I think Judith's point of view is very valid, Reg, provided the Movement never forgets that it is the inalienable right of every man—
- STAN:
- Or woman.
- FRANCIS:
- Or woman... to rid himself—
- STAN:
- Or herself.
- FRANCIS:
- Or herself.
- REG:
- Agreed.
- FRANCIS:
- Thank you, brother.
- STAN:
- Or sister.
- FRANCIS:
- Or sister. Where was I?
- REG:
- I think you'd finished.
- FRANCIS:
- Oh. Right.
- REG:
- Furthermore, it is the birthright of every man—
- STAN:
- Or woman.
- REG:
- Why don't you shut up about women, Stan. You're putting us off.
- STAN:
- Women have a perfect right to play a part in our movement, Reg.
- FRANCIS:
- Why are you always on about women, Stan?
- STAN:
- I want to be one.
- REG:
- What?
- STAN:
- I want to be a woman. From now on, I want you all to call me 'Loretta'.
- REG:
- What?!
- LORETTA:
- It's my right as a man.
- JUDITH:
- Well, why do you want to be Loretta, Stan?
- LORETTA:
- I want to have babies.
- REG:
- You want to have babies?!
- LORETTA:
- It's every man's right to have babies if he wants them.
- REG:
- But... you can't have babies.
- LORETTA:
- Don't you oppress me.
- REG:
- I'm not oppressing you, Stan. You haven't got a womb! Where's the foetus going to gestate?! You going to keep it in a box?!
- LORETTA:
- [crying]
- JUDITH:
- Here! I— I've got an idea. Suppose you agree that he can't actually have babies, not having a womb, which is nobody's fault, not even the Romans', but that he can have the right to have babies.
- FRANCIS:
- Good idea, Judith. We shall fight the oppressors for your right to have babies, brother. Sister. Sorry.
- REG:
- What's the point?
- FRANCIS:
- What?
- REG:
- What's the point of fighting for his right to have babies when he can't have babies?!
- FRANCIS:
- It is symbolic of our struggle against oppression.
- REG:
- Symbolic of his struggle against reality.
I'll bet you're glad you asked!
Hey! Perception! And association with perception! Why didn't I think of that (aside from the whole sanity thing)?SEC. 10. Section 219 is added to the Education Code, to read:
219. Disability, gender, nationality, race or ethnicity, religion, sexual orientation,
or any other characteristic contained in the definition of hate crimes set forth
in Section 422.55 of the Penal Code includes a perception that the person has any of those
characteristics or that the person is associated with a person who
has, or is perceived to have, any of those characteristics.
Get ready, kids! The money's gushing down toward the Money Spigot ~~
Your Civil Rights can be violated if, upon not making the cheer-leading squad, you can convince an attorney that you have been denied "educational opportunity" via harassment such as hearing a fellow student say something along the lines of "that's so gay" or "that's tight"*** or because you once bumped into a Special Ed kid in the quad — even if it was an accident and no one actually saw you do it!
My only hope — and it is in some ways a "poison pill" sort of hope — is that the Legislation has opened up the doors for suits against public schools on such a grand scale that the already teetering state economy will collapse under the strain of paying off and defending against the inevitable spree of money-grabbing special interest groups that will now try and take the system for all its worth.
Which is becoming worth less and less every year, it seems.
***I include Section 220 here, though it is redundant (what in government is not?), as it is the CENTERPIECE of the legislation on "civil rights."
SEC. 11. Section 220 of the Education Code is amended to read:
220. No person shall be subjected to discrimination on the basis
of disability, gender, nationality, race or ethnicity, religion,
sexual orientation, or any other characteristic that is contained in
the definition of hate crimes set forth in Section 422.55 of the
Penal Code in any program or activity conducted by an educational
institution that receives, or benefits from, state financial
assistance or enrolls pupils who receive state student financial aid.
Watch now, the slippery and sad attempts to stay ahead of public understanding of euphemisms... is "handicapped" not working anymore? Let's change it! How about "student"? Does that imply too much studying? And that "Superintendent of Instruction" title has got to go — what does a public school have to do with education, anyhoo?
SEC. 15. Section 14058 of the Education
Code is amended to read:
14058. (a) For allhandicappedadults
with disabilities educated by the county superintendent
of schools, for all secondary schools maintained in
juvenile halls, juvenile homes, and juvenile camps by the county
superintendent of schools, and for allstudents
pupils enrolled in grades 9 to 12, inclusive, in
opportunity schools and classes and all continuation schools and
classes maintained by the county superintendent of schools, the
Superintendentof Public Instructionshall allow the same amount
as he or she would ...
Most of the legislation consists of such linguistic side-pedaling:
Paragraphs and paragraphs of this.SEC. 54. Section 72013 of the Education
Code is repealed.
72013. With respect to access to community college district
services, classes, and programs, and with respect to all references
within this division, "handicap" and "disability" shall have the same
meaning.
But I'm putting my money down on Sections 200-219 to really cause the majority of "tort" damages. I'll wager if I can just get Wrymouth Jr. to hang out with the wrong crowd, I can get the $$ to roll in! Ka-ching! Observe:
C'mon... put your mind to it... let's say, I want to discuss complex functions in terms of their "parent" functions (as such language is commonly used in upper levels of mathematics since the middle 20th century, at least). Dare I talk about "mommy" and "daddy" functions? Dare I?SEC. 15.SEC. 29. Section 51500 of
the Education Code is amended to read:
51500. No teacher shall give instruction nor shall a school
district sponsor any activity that reflects adversely upon persons
because of a characteristic listed in Section 220.
SEC. 16.SEC. 30. Section 51501 of
the Education Code is amended to read:
51501. No textbook,or other instructional
materials shall be adopted by the state board or by any governing
board for use in the public schools that contains any matter
reflecting adversely upon persons because of a characteristic listed
in Section 220.
—-
Many are up in arms over the California Student Civil Rights Act. I think the problem could be resolved by repealing, not that act, but the underlying "hate crimes" legislation.
Hey, California: enforce the laws against crime; then outlawing "thought crime" will be rendered unnecessary.
—-
* And, naturally, you are concerned with my worries about my "freedoms" — am I some sort of KKK-belonging, Black Panther-allied, MeCHa-loving scumbag who exults in the superiority of people who are most like myself?
** despite what your well-meaning English teacher ever taught you.
*** these phrases, which I detest, are sadly common even among grade school & middle school kids and are rife in the high school community. And I teach at a private school — I can well remember what sort of language is used in public schools.



Loved you take on this. Absolutely right on! And now with the expose of his royal highness, Superintendent Jack O'Connell's memo to all district supers regarding the student boycott in Nov. we can see that his real concern is the money loss.
http://www.flashreport.org/files/2007120311235734.pdf
While I appreciate his concern that those students who stayed home on those days would lead to "missed opportunities to learn and may not be recaptured", I have to ask "learn what?" Most anything missed can be learned in the comfort of one's own home! At least there you'll have more chance of learning the truth.
Just ask any college drop-out. Been there, done that.
It's time to take your children out of the public school system.
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I am happy to hear that you got something out of my little diatribe... I am not entirely happy with it, but it is part of a system where so much is spinning out-of-true all at once. I get a little discombobulated when I ponder the public schools system, especially, mind you, in the Los Angeles area.
I suppose if I were closer to DC or Chicago, I would be even more dismayed.
As concerns college education, I can say I have dropped out and graduated with an advanced degree in mathematics. Graduating is better.
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