My First Vow of the Summer?
... to finish that math book, finally? No.
... to be a better husband and father? Maybe.
I was thinking I'd vow never, ever to complain about the occasional solifugid (AKA wind scorpion) that gets into my house, after seeing this picture*:
Aieee!!!
Now I know they are also called "camel spiders." Lovely.
The biggest I've ever seen is about oh, I dunno, 4-5 inches long. And trust me, 4-5 inches of camel spider goes a long way in the revulsion department, even if they are dead. And, if they are alive, everyone nearby commences the "spider dance" — running around, arms retracted with hands at shoulder height waving spasmodically. "Eww! Eeeww!!"
Those above look to be about the size of a man's calf. I could only imagine what havoc a foot-long camel spider would wreak inside my humble home.
Luckily for humanity, once — if — you get beyond the initial horror, you will notice that the soldier nearest the camera is probably holding something to which these li'l fellahs have glommed onto right in front of the lens.
And it is the deep focus of the camera which puts the creatures in the same focal plane as the other soldier's legs.
I'm guessing if these were actually 12-14 inches long, each, the soldiers would have shot them a few times before picking them up, and I don't see any bullet-holes.
Still. I guess I'll start with the "better husband and father" vow. That'd be the easier one for me to keep, anyway.
* Tip o the Cap to Michelle Malkin's Hot Air for sticking this image in my brain. Thanks ever so!
I wish I hadn't seen that. Truly.
Spiders serve a useful purpose, so we are told. I feel bad, because I am not feeling their evolutionary priority over adding another gazilion ccs of DDT to the ecosystem. Sprrray the flies, and sook the spiders up the vacuum cleaner.
I had the most enormous spider on my bathroom roof. My garden is lush and green and unmanaged, and things grow biiiiig there. My daughter refused to cross the threshold, as the creature was a hansdpan in width. Knowing I could never do anything effective, I called a taxi, and offered the elderly driver an extra £5.00 if he would dispose of it, before taking us into town. He rolled up his newspaper, squared his shoulders and strode into the fray. Oaths followed, and muffled shrieks, as it fell on his bunnet, and then to the floor, with an audible smack, before it shuffled off its mortal coil. Best fiver I ever spent.
Those things in the pic look like some sort of hanging game waiting to be gralloched.
I think I have PTSD.
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I am sure Dr. Bob and especially Wrymette would concur with your canny use of a cabbie. Did you actually have to go into town, or was that a ruse to get the cabbie to kill the spider?
P.S. -- if you ever thought "all baby creatures are cute" I invite you to look up pix of baby camel spiders. That'll larn ya!
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I did have to go into town, for a driving lesson. Howevah, the idea hit me as I lurked cross-legged outside the smallest room, before making the call to the cab company. One does not want to lurch up over pavements at 30mph with a full-bladder. (I did lurch over pavements, even after 20hours of rigorous driving lessons. {Thought that only happened on the Keystone Kops. I am out of time for a niche in Hollywood. Sigh. )
Thanx, but I shall pass on googling hideous infant arachnids. I had to sleep with the lights on, upstairs and down, after seeing those delightful specimens.
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EEEEEWWW! EEW! SPIDER DANCE! SPIDER DANCE!
(those are orders of magnitude bigger then the shoe-smacking variety I would be more then happy to dance for....) Ick! Pulling feet off the floor, just in case....
Rowan, I totally support your resourcefulness. I am tucking that little tip away for future use--big bug, call a cab. :)
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Good HEAVENS. That's no spider. That's a face-hugger from Aliens!
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I assure you, Ben, that they are perfectly AIEEEEE MY FOOT MY FOOT I CAN'T FEEL MY TOES
BTW, Ben, always glad to have one of the infinite monkeys' commentaries over here to spruce the place up. ;o/
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